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  Back to Chat Transcripts Getting Support from Significant Others

Getting Support from Significant Others
With Wendy Satin Rapaport

Chat Room Administrator (206.112.197.133) Tue Mar 27 2001 20:53:39 Eastern US
The 'Feelings Matter' chat room is now open.


Tue Mar 27 2001 20:56:52 Eastern US
Cindy (MI) (Matt-age 12, dxd 2-00, pumper) from 63.64.148.191
Hello?

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:57:41 Eastern US
Jeff Hitchcock from 206.112.197.133
Hi Cindy ...

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:57:46 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Hi Cindy.

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:58:17 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Good evening to all and welcome to tonight's "Feelings Matter" chat. Our guest host tonight is Dr. Wendy Satin-Rapaport, author of a great book for every person dealing with diabetes - personally or through family/friends "When Diabetes Hits Home.' Our topic tonight is how to get support from family and friends. The chat will start at 9pm Eastern -- and all questions and comments are welcome.

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:58:26 Eastern US
Cindy (MI) (Matt-age 12, dxd 2-00, pumper) from 63.64.148.191
I though I was along here. I though this was a scheduled chat tonght.

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:58:31 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn from 209.86.44.28
Hello everyone!

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:58:36 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Hi Cindy and Jeff -- the troops are gathering...

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:58:37 Eastern US
Joyce (Justin 16, pumping soon) from 64.12.103.181
Hello everyone

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:58:58 Eastern US
Jeff Hitchcock from 206.112.197.133
Cindy ... yes, we have a scheduled chat tonight and you're right on time

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:07 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
This chat was MADE for me. After 3 1/2 yrs of begging my husband to come up to speed . . . . !!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:08 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Also Krissy Lynn and Moira --

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:27 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Joyce what is the pump start date for you?

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:27 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Moira - we've got to stop meeting like this!! LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:38 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn from 209.86.44.28
Hello Betty!

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:46 Eastern US
Cindy (MI) (Matt-age 12, dxd 2-00, pumper) from 63.64.148.191
Joyce, When does he start pumping?

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:48 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Hi. Betty you're getting to be quite a regular around here :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:55 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
good evening...better late---or regularly late..thanks to Ellen"s guidance I am here

Tue Mar 27 2001 20:59:55 Eastern US
Mike (type 1 using pump since 1-25-01) from 206.216.113.150
feelings..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:00:11 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
evening everyone....I cleaned out all of our book shelves & even located my copy of Wendy's book!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:00:14 Eastern US
Joyce (Justin 16, pumping soon) from 64.12.103.181
This Thursday

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:00:47 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Hi Wendy - so glad you made it.. and thanks to Ellen for helping out!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:00:51 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn from 209.86.44.28
Hello Dr. Wendy!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:00:51 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
I know Betty! Some day we must chat in a non official way -- I'm a writer and author too . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:00:56 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Renee why is your copy so dusty?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:01:05 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Wendy Ellen told me ALL about you!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:01:06 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn from 209.86.44.28
Hello Renee!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:01:15 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
actually I do think reading is helpful

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:01:39 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
not dusty -- well worn

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:01:51 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Yep, Ellen, I make it around to moderate most of the hosted chats...

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:01:56 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Moira what do you write about

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:02:14 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Oooh Joyce that is exciting. Best of luck for your Pump-ternity leave

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:02:22 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn (future pediatric endocrinologist) from 209.86.44.28
How is everyone doing?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:02:23 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Wendy, next time I see you, I'll tell you all about Moira ;-)!!!

BTW, Wendy, Dr. Nemery's husband told me to tell you hello.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:02:29 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
not dusty Wendy - just misplaced! I have read it & thought it was excellent....now if only we could find a way to infuse all that insight & information into our friends & family who don't "get it" no matter how well or often we explain!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:02:47 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
I write for SKI and Tennis Magazine as well as Nat. Geographic Adventure -- mostly high adventure travel. :Book on women's golf coming out

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:03:12 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Yes good point Renee--the tolerance we need when people don't get it..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:03:15 Eastern US
StanNMB (Diabetes 56 yrs.) from 172.137.52.152
Hi Dr. Wendy! Just wanted to say hello and regards from R and myself. Hope all is well with you.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:03:19 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Amen Renee

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:03:50 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
good to remember that people don't change easily..ourselves included..even though we have been so helpful in repeating ourselves about what we need

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:04:07 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
I could give my right arm to have someone on board with this thing as much or close to as much as I am -- my husband, my mother, ANYONE!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:04:09 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn (future pediatric endocrinologist) from 209.86.44.28
Hello StanNMB!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:04:35 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Moira..don't forget to be in touch with Michelle McGann about your golf book? I bet it would be mutually helpful

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:04:50 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Moira, you sound like a good woman to know. It's wonderful to write about things that excite you and give joy to others!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:04:51 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Stan are you the man I know from Miami

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:05:09 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Book is done Wendy and it's on all the dead women golfers. . . or near dead

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:05:41 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
I deeply appreciate my career. I am so thankful to be so lucky!!! and it blends well with caring for Lauren too

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:05:41 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Moira, sounds like you feel like the Lone Ranger

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:05:44 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Moira..what stands in your way from getting someone to be there for you?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:06:04 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
56 yrs with D WOW!!! Did you have a
"BASH"

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:06:08 Eastern US
StanNMB (Diabetes 56 yrs.) from 172.137.52.152
YUP. And we remember you well and I was just asking about you last week at UMDC

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:06:26 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
cloest you'll come to that Moira is probably another mom of a child with diabetes....we all seem to speak the same language

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:06:38 Eastern US
StanNMB (Diabetes 56 yrs.) from 172.137.52.152
What is a "BASH"?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:06:39 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Moira makes another good point...about doing something "other than diabetes" so you have sanity and balance

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:06:47 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Wendy I don't know. I know part of it is I am a controller -- but I have begged and pleaded and cried for years. I think it's easier for all around me to just let me do it all. It's very sad for me . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:07:47 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Stan..how is your son? You can probably be helpful about being the grownup who has diabetes and its impact on the family

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:07:48 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
My husband is just in denial. He swore up and down when we decided to pump that THIS TIME he would learn. He really hasn't. I have to leave him pages and pages of notes and he still does not get it . . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:14 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @ 3, pumping 3+yrs) from 199.174.147.141
Good evening

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:23 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Gosh I sound needy!! Sorry . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:31 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Moira, you may need to leave more concise notes. Have you tried a sticky?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:33 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
hey Kristy!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:43 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
One thing I have seen..that relates to Moira..is that sometimes when you are a controller?? the other people in the house think they can never get it down as well as you..and so they don't compete

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:45 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
Wendy - a friend's daughter was just hospitalized with unexplained seizures..nothing was resolved but the mom is coping fine...the dad however is a complete wreck...I told her that was reminiscent of when Melissa was dx'd: my husband was completely shaken by NOT being able to "fix everything" by tightening some loose screws!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:54 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
what do you mean a sticky? Hit him with a stick LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:08:57 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn (future pediatric endocrinologist) from 209.86.44.28
Hi Kristy

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:09:25 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Very good point Wendy.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:09:41 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Moira, what you're saying is repeated over and over in the chats. MANY people find themselves in your place -- needing help but not having been successful so far in getting what they want and need.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:09:42 Eastern US
StanNMB (Diabetes 56 yrs.) from 172.137.52.152
My son is well, thank you. He is married (2 yrs.), in the army and expecting his first child.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:09:45 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Hello Christy..oops Kristy...I have seen husbands who are reluctant to take a child for the whole day because the first question from the mom is what about the blood sugars and granted it will nvder be as normal as when the mom has the child all day..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:10:03 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Hello

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:10:13 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Sean was raised in a home where sickness = weakness. The way they dealt with illness was to shake it off, ignore it

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:10:30 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
and so you have to "positively reframe" what went well for the husband and then figure out later about the details of diabetes...establishing the confidence of the other person??

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:10:38 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn (future pediatric endocrinologist) from 209.86.44.28
Hi Judith...

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:10:49 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn (future pediatric endocrinologist) from 209.86.44.28
I haven't talked to you in a while.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:10:50 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Hey, Judith!! Welcome!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:04 Eastern US
StanNMB (Diabetes 56 yrs.) from 172.137.52.152
I think that my diabetes has had a very minimal impact on my family (we have had our fair share of problems like every one else)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:09 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Sounds good Wendy. I know I do that too -- what were her #'s??? Oh, and how are you? Like that . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:14 Eastern US
gary (...(visit the 'Diabetes Poetry Room' at) geocities.com/gmhco) from 63.26.67.115
hello everyone, don't mind ME, I'm just lurking!! :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:39 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
my daughter's CDE runs a new group called "Survivors" which has drawn 25 parents both times..what was interesting was that 8 dads also came last time & although some were visibly uncomfortable initially, by the end they were all sharing & nodding in agreement

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:46 Eastern US
Heidyn (type 1 pumping saline...) from 164.106.22.70
Hi everyone

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:53 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
See now if I could just live in a big compound with Judith and Ellen and Kristy etc etc etc . . . I'd be all set. Like the Jenny Garp house only we keep our tongues

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:11:58 Eastern US
Mike (type 1 using pump since 1-25-01) from 206.216.113.150
Hey I am lurking too (:-))

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:01 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Hi gary - thanks for stopping by

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:43 Eastern US
Joyce (Justin 16, pumping soon) from 64.12.103.181
Moira...sometimes we forget that there is more to the person. Maybe if you started asking about their day and then slip in about the bs's maybe that would work better

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:44 Eastern US
Mike (type 1 using pump since 1-25-01) from 206.216.113.150
how well does the saline work Heidyn lol

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:47 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
LOL Moira....beware the "undertoad" though!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:47 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Krissy Lynn..when is this future pediatric endocrin status going to happen?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:47 Eastern US
Krissy Lynn (future pediatric endocrinologist) from 209.86.44.28
Okay, I guess I should leave now since no one wants to talk to me.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:48 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Heidyn, good to see you. Jump right in!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:12:59 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
LOL Moira! I think it would be more profitable if we take our show on the road.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:13:09 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Gary and Mike..please don't"lurk"...we need some male perspective

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:13:16 Eastern US
Liz from 152.163.201.188
Hi Everyone

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:13:22 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
what engages men to be a part

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:13:23 Eastern US
gary (...(visit the 'Diabetes Poetry Room' at) geocities.com/gmhco) from 63.26.67.115
thank you BettyB for moderating :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:13:30 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
I think the best thing I ever did to break me from the 'control' issue, was to leave Ron with the kids for an entire week 2 summers ago. He had to sink or swim:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:13:40 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
But you have to understand - -Sean is CLUELESS. I am going on a business trip to Telluride Thurs ( :-) ) and I'm worried sick . . . but I'm doing it and letting him do it . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:14:19 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Yes Joyce..just like people with diabetes don't want to be seen as diabetetics first..but people first...so do the caregivers

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:14:22 Eastern US
NormaJean (Samantha, 7, dx 12/99, pumping) from 64.12.102.39
I'm a control freak too Moira, and therefore i shut other people out who can help, like my husband, and then when i want help it's not there

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:14:32 Eastern US
Heidyn (type 1 pumping saline...) from 164.106.22.70
Mike,it does its job,(training)thats about it

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:14:46 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
I think Kristy's right...but the child has to be old enough to know a lot about his/her own care to do that safely.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:14:52 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Sean with his "hands on" and being totally responsible will probably rise to the occasion..and if not he will learn

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:03 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Sean and I were such equals, and since lauren's dx we have slipped into this Ward and June Cleaver alterworld where I do all the parent things and he brings the cash home. It's strange and I don't like it (except for the cash)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:09 Eastern US
Susie from 207.29.206.75
Hi :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:38 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
How involved were these dads in other aspects of parenting - BEFORE d? I'd expect less involvement from most, rather than more after dx

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:39 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
I learned that I really disempowered my husband through that kind of control, so I've gradually empowered him to handle more.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:43 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Kind of like "on the job" training...less intimidating than the theory

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:52 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
I am also SO jealous when I see grandparents involved. . . . those mothers are blessed to have grandparents like that

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:15:59 Eastern US
gary (...(visit the 'Diabetes Poetry Room' at) geocities.com/gmhco) from 63.26.67.115
SUSIE!!:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:01 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Judith, Ron had never changed a site until the week before that trip!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:34 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Moira is psychic: answered before I asked.
How are you doing, Krissy?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:40 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
in general I find males function better with black or white - not "grey" & since so much of diabetes is often in that "grey zone", it's truly an uncomfortable place for them to be...my hubby always asks WHY her numbers are off- as if I knew!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:40 Eastern US
NormaJean (Samantha, 7, dx 12/99, pumping) from 64.12.102.39
Sean will probably do fine with you gone. I know my husband would do better w/ me not around.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:41 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
I thinnk couples can learn to change..when one person is burned out enough..change comes from need

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:48 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
NormaJean, Liz and Susie - jump in -- topic is how to help other people help you, (I think!)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:16:55 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Sean has done it once. Lauren does her own with supervision anyway though . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:17:49 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Sometimes it is a good idea to practice when you are in the house..planned..purposeful..locking your door and refusing to come out..everyone knows in advance.. a "game" of sorts

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:18:04 Eastern US
Liz ("Mom of Steven, 9, Dx'd 3 Months Ago") from 152.163.201.188
In my case I'm a Single Parent.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:18:22 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
And even when you are supervising your child//you can do it in ways that your child feels dependent..or that you are faciliating her independence??

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:18:27 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Liz that has got to be hard

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:18:44 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Liz, whom do you get to help you? everyone needs a timeout

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:19:08 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Remember, men get diabetes too -- even the "black and white" thinkers. Their style for caring for their diabetes is often a bit different than a woman's, but there's more than one style that works.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:19:30 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
I think others would not only rise to the occasion, but do better just because 1) they have to and 2) the "expert" is not watching

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:19:50 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Renee when your husband asks you why your daughter's number s are off..do you get angry/ try to answer

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:20:08 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
betty would you describe those male vs female differences?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:20:10 Eastern US
Liz ("Mom of Steven, 9, Dx'd 3 Months Ago") from 152.163.201.188
I keep getting bumped from this room, sorry

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:20:25 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
I liked your comment earlier about a sort of "trial run," Wendy.. less worry on everyone's part to get in a little safe practice

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:20:26 Eastern US
gary (...(visit the 'Diabetes Poetry Room' at) geocities.com/gmhco) from 63.26.67.115
Mike, we better hide under the table and QUICK!! LOL :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:20:41 Eastern US
Liz from 152.163.201.188
Steven's Dad has him (and my other 2 boys) 2 weekends a month. That's my break!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:20:48 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
It would probably be helpful to explore with your husband.."Does it frustrate you when her numbers are off? Does it make you feel like you have done something wrong?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:21:00 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
very true Betty when they are the patient....but when it's the child & both parents approach it so differently, that can create problems even unintentionally...

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:21:07 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Bettty, you have a way with words and creativity

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:21:41 Eastern US
Mike (type 1 using pump since 1-25-01) from 206.216.113.150
you first gary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:21:53 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
The best message Renee is that children see the different ways and don't feel afraid of that..see difference not as polarizing

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:22:04 Eastern US
Liz from 152.163.201.188
I always question what "I've" done when Steven's #'s are off.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:22:04 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
How do I get my husband to take some responsibilty for our son's care? If I leave, he never does bg checks & rarely boluses for food!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:22:15 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
no - I usually tell him it must be a full moon!...and I also tell him not to ask why they're "off" but to be gald they're fine most of the time!!..i.e. this is not the exacting science he'd like it to be

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:23:01 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Dr Wendy, my husband and I have had an on-going little argument regarding our son. Ron gets frustrated with Drew because he leave bainaids all around the house from finger sticks.Ron think that Drew should be mature enough to throw away the bainaids. I tend to be the more sympathetic push over...I feel sorry for the kid for having to test so often. Who wins this issue?:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:23:03 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Conflict is inevitable..not being afraid of it requires relaxation! and skill

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:23:07 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
Hello--- My husband was much more helpful when Step was little.. once she turned about 12 he couldn't understand why I was still so involved.. (and, I admit-- I'm a control freak so that doesn't help)--

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:23:31 Eastern US
Joyce (Justin 16, soon pumping) from 64.12.103.181
How old is steven Liz?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:23:51 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Kristy..you both do..yur son needs the compassion and he needs the discipline...combine your talents

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:00 Eastern US
Liz (Calif) ("Mom of Steven, 9, Dx'd 3 Months Ago") from 152.163.201.188
I'm new at dealing w/D. I still feel so bad for my son.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:03 Eastern US
Laurie (mom of Patrick,19, dx'd 11-96 ) from 12.149.228.246
Good Evening all

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:24 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
excellent point Wendy...never going to change male/female differences...so we need to empower our children to see that mom & dad just do things differently....

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:40 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Liz of course you do. It takes a LONG time to get used to it

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:46 Eastern US
Heidyn (type 1 pumping saline...) from 164.106.22.70
Hi Laurie

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:47 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Hehehehe!! Riley is almost 6, has been pumping for almost a year now. My husband is STILL in denial (almost 2 yrs dx's). He says he sufferes termendous guilt that our son has this and he can't get around that!!:O(

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:49 Eastern US
Liz (Calif) from 152.163.201.188
Steven's 9 years. So far he's been handling it great! It's me that is stressing out about it.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:24:49 Eastern US
gary (...(visit the 'Diabetes Poetry Room' at) geocities.com/gmhco) from 63.26.67.115
LAURIE!!!!!:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:25:06 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
We have swabs--old pump sets.. strips.. all over.. the only thing I get crazy about is the sharp canula introducer needle.. that is the one thing I really hated about the precision foil wrapped strips..one more thing to pick up.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:25:10 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Actually Marcia we do have to be careful not to drop our children off too early..they look grown up but need our shift to be "supervisory" rather than controlling..tell your husband you need his help to modify but not give up

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:25:56 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Our floors are littered with those little dex strips and now the freestyle . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:04 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
Amy--does your husband have diabetes.. why does he feel guilty?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:05 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Liz-one thing I do is ask myself: "how would I handle this if Riley didn't have D?" and go from there.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:05 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Drew is such a slob, and Ron is such a Mr. Clean...such opposites.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:18 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Moira, these are BIG generalizations and they often cross gender lines, but... more of my male patients seem to focus first and foremost on tasks and measures (tell me what to do and why) whereas more women seem to want women to talk through and manage the feelings around the tasks first (I want to talk about how upset I am before I lern how to do this, that's going to be tough, I need to figure out how to fit that in). Wendy, does that match up with your experience at all?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:25 Eastern US
Liz (Calif) ("Mom of Steven, 9, Dx'd 3 Months Ago") from 152.163.201.188
I just found out yesterday that my 7 year old son tested positive for antibodies therefore, D for him is in the future. I'm sick over that.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:34 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
No, he doesn't but he knows he got the genes from him and me so he feel that he is responsible for it!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:46 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Dave's dad STILL doesn't "get it"...after more than 15 yrs (and a PhD in biology).

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:26:49 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Amy you have a good start because your husband identifies what is in his way...but maybe he needs some professional help so he does not "cop out" and miss the intimacy his son needs..it can feel like rejection to a child..and it can also model rejection of the diabetes

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:27:09 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 17) from 206.253.63.164
Good evening.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:27:14 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Liz is that a definite? I know a girl who tested postitive three years ago -- still nothing

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:27:24 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
hearing my friend complain about her husband's inability to accept that his 19 yr old daughter "might" have a medical problem, actually helped me better understand what my husband was feeling 8 1/2 yrs ago...

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:27:31 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Yes Betty I agree with you..men are more task oriented..and that is effective too

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:27:38 Eastern US
NormaJean (Samantha, 7, dx 12/99, pumping) from 64.12.102.39
I keep thinking that when "things settle down" my husband will catch up. I do all the calculations even when she's at school.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:09 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
But it upsets me that Sean is like that --- I NEED him, darn it. And he just floats along . . . . he's a great guy and worships his daughters, but golly . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:12 Eastern US
Laurie (mom of Patrick,19, dx'd 11-96 ) from 12.149.228.246
My SO Randy was great when Ryan was dx'd. He went to the first few Endo appointments. Then stopped. He also stopped wanting to learn things. He treats the boys with what we were taught in the hospital. He kinda thinks what I've learned on-line is hog wash.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:12 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Amy, even though there may be a "genetic predisposition" it is NOT necessarily inherited. Could be something that happened to the egg or sperm, or in the early developmental stages of the embryo

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:15 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Good ideal Dr. Wendy-I've approached this with him but he doesn't want to go, I think he thinks that getting help amounts to you being "crazy" you know? Who should he see?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:18 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
We have to stop thinking that our way is better...whether it is our "gender" way or just style...we have to appreciate differences in people/

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:29 Eastern US
sharon (2 kids with D) from 165.247.24.77
hi all

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:40 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Liz, that's a hard one. Are you in the prevention trial?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:52 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
He should see Dr. Wendy!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:28:58 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Hi, Sharon -- long time no see!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:03 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 17) from 206.253.63.164
Laurie!! Hi!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:09 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Judith-I'll have to tell him that, I keep saying there is nothing we did or Riley did for him to have this. This was a big shock to him, but I have a sis that was dx'd at 3 so I grew up with D.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:22 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
ROFL!!! I wish he was home so he could talk to her!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:27 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Amy consider going together..for starters..to lessen the stigma..and to share the load..as you do not want to be the "enabler of his guilt..see a psychologist or social worker who is trained in chronic illness if not diabetes?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:32 Eastern US
sharon (2 kids with D) from 165.247.24.77
hi betty :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:37 Eastern US
Liz (Calif) from 152.163.201.188
We are going on for the next test. (The 10 min. Glucose Tolerance type test) We'll find out after we get those results.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:39 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Drew told us at dinner the other evening that some kid on the playground told Drew that he didn't want to play with him because he had diabetes. Ron had to leave the table...I saw so much pain in his eyes. I hate those moments..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:29:51 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
But I do agree with your assessment that I intimidate him. I can work on that

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:30:03 Eastern US
Laurie (mom of Patrick,19, dx'd 11-96 ) from 12.149.228.246
Beth is that really you?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:30:21 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
My husband once called me at work because Steph was being hateful.. she got on the phone sobbing.. bg was 35-- I got him back on the phone and told im to get her some juice NOW!! (he had told her to get it) and BTW told him to get the glucagon ready.. He actually asked "Where is it?"-- I told him the same ^$^@#%@ place it hads been for 10 years!!!"---that was about 3 years ago.. Steph will be 18 in 6 months so getting pretty independent now.. but I still try to be supportive.. do some night checks.. and early morning checks on weekends so she can sleep in.. and she still wants me to go into the Drs with her..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:30:43 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
Kristy - we ALL hate those moments...hard on the siblings too hearing things like that

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:30:44 Eastern US
gary (...(visit the 'Diabetes Poetry Room' at) geocities.com/gmhco) from 63.26.67.115
bye everyone...I'll be back when I have a significant other'!!:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:30:58 Eastern US
Joyce (Justin 16, soon pumping) from 64.12.103.181
bye Gary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:08 Eastern US
sharon (2 kids with D) from 165.247.24.77
hi & bye gary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:17 Eastern US
Laurie (mom of Patrick,19, dx'd 11-96 ) from 12.149.228.246
Bye Gary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:28 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Kristy..remind Drew that it was great that he told you what happened...because you always want to keep your children open..and if you can appeal to Ron not leaving the table because he does not want to give the mesage to Drew that Drew upsets him..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:34 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Ta, Gary,, thanks for stopping in.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:35 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Gary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:40 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
My older daughter told lauren she was "lucky" to have D this week -- Lauren LOST it

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:31:49 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
What about your relationships Gary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:32:19 Eastern US
sharon (2 kids with D) from 165.247.24.77
marcia, my husband wouldnt even know what glucagon was. i gave hime a refresher, recently, so i know!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:32:45 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Moira it was a good thing that your oldest daughter spoke her mind...after all..for her she sees things are better somehow for hersister

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:32:52 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
There is a couple in our town with an older girl who has had D since she was seven. the Dad is the caregiver, the mom the dodger . . . so it's not a gender thing all the time

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:33:06 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Kristy, how did Drew handle it? Did you have any words of wisdom to share with him?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:33:28 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
my older daughter is seeing all through her hormone goggles lately LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:33:43 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Moira..even though Lauren got upset..it is not because her sister said something..she needed that outlet..hope it ended up helpful to all..and if not...make them goet together agina and redo what it meant

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:33:54 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
It is really me. Good to see you.
I was more the caregiver in our household. Still am when she needs help of any kind.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:34:11 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Not like Ron to have to get up and leave..if you had seen Drew's face however, you could almost understand. We love this kid so passionately..:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:34:19 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Did the older daughter get a chance to say why she thinks having D is a good deal, Moira?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:34:58 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
:-) Kristy

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:35:04 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
I think as Ellen said..take a look at how Drew handled it..and it is good to rehearse things and come up with new ways to handle

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:35:29 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Remind yourself Kristy and Ron that love is not about handling things right the first time

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:35:51 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19,dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16,dx'd 1-96) from 12.149.228.246
Good seeing you Beth. It's hard giving up that control. It doesn't matter if its to the SO or to the young men or women.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:35:57 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
I just choked Ellen..most likely didn't say anything worth a @(#* ...I need to be ready for that the next time..can anyone empower me with some good things to say?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:36:04 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
So going to the playground and punching out the kid is NOT the right response??!!! That must have been hard Kristy

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:36:26 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Ellen -- tell them about the note cards like you told me for Lauren!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:36:32 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
Laurie - you have 2 teenaged sons both diagnosed in the same year??????

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:36:50 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Hard to give it up especially since the motivation still isn't always there for Sara but has to be done.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:36:51 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Moira, Wendy came up with the cards idea.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:36:58 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19,dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16,dx'd 1-96) from 12.149.228.246
Sorry Ryan was 95 Pat 96

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:37:09 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
You are describing some painful things..which is good to let out..and then to imagine us all on line.holding each other with warmth and new ideas..that is an image of support that we can all walk around with..the kind of support that we carry in our minds

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:37:13 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping 1/01) from 24.48.181.11
Well Wendy I LOVE that idea

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:37:41 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
do your sons help each other out Laurie?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:37:56 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
She starts pumping May 2nd. It won't be much because she's still not taking much insulin but we're hoping for more freedom with that.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:38:12 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Drew just seems so much more social lately..and more aware of the whole friend thing..he has never had a really close buddy...I think maybe he is wishing for a best friend.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:38:26 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Going to the playground and punching out the kid is the right"fantasy" and joke to make first...and then move on from there...we have to allow the feelings in and modify how we behave..like anything else in our lives

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:38:30 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
We've never had anyone say that to Riley, but we have had parents move their kids when we've done bg checks in public. I usually use those moments to give a little D education tip or a public service announcement!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:38:31 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19,dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16,dx'd 1-96) from 12.149.228.246
I hear you there Beth. Ryan needs lots of push. But, Patrick has always been very independent.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:38:47 Eastern US
Moira from 24.48.181.11
He has a bride Kristy :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:39:29 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Kristy I would imagine at 8 the other child really has no idea what diabetes is - is it possible for the teacher to talk to him about what he said to Drew - in a nice way so the child doesn't feel like he's in trouble, but rather can understand that Drew is a kid just like him?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:39:49 Eastern US
Moira from 24.48.181.11
When a girl said that to Lauren, or something like "You think you are so cool because you have diabetes" Lauren told me she stopped cold and said, "Emily. That is the CRUELEST thing anyone has EVER said to me. You need to think that over!" And walked away

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:39:57 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
The toughest thing for me has been to turn things over more to Steph--(Most of you have heard about the time she threw her meter at me and told me to "Get your own diabetes!!")-- It is hard to see her not testing like I know she should.. bolusing without testing.. eating without bolusing.not keeping records. etc, etc..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:40:09 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Good for yu, Amy -- :-) chutzpah wins the day!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:40:37 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
way to go LAUREN!!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:40:42 Eastern US
Moira from 24.48.181.11
I cannot begin to imagine, Marcia. But that "get your own" lline is funny!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:40:50 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Hahahahaha-thanks Betty!!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:40:56 Eastern US
Moira from 24.48.181.11
Lauren is so much more in tune than I am!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:41:04 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Amy it is also good to come out with something easy or funny so it is not always so serious and difficult on you...but if it feeels good to you and your child..do it exactly like you are doing

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:41:19 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
hey betty,,chutzpah is my line

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:41:25 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Renee no they don't they fight over most everything. My levels better than yours.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:41:38 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Little boy was not in Drew's class..this happened with another student on the playground. Kids in his class are all cool with it..have literally all been together since preschool. But, I think that maybe Drew was reaching out to be friends with this boy, and he was rejected..AHHH...that is so hard to say!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:41:40 Eastern US
Moira from 24.48.181.11
ps of course I would NEVER punch a kid out at the playground or anywwhere . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:42:06 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
OOPs, sorry, Wendy - I learn all the best things from my friends!! LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:42:34 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Its easier now because Patrick is pumping, Aug. 2000. and he is in his 2nd year of college two states away.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:42:40 Eastern US
Moira from 24.48.181.11
Laurie that has got to be hard!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:42:45 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Kriszty..remember it was probably not rejection..just temporary fear, wonder..we have to help our children and ourselves not be defensive

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:42:46 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
one of my friend's best lines when her daughter is actuing obnoxious is "you BETTER be high!"...that one gave the parents group a good laugh! If we didn't find some wacky humor in all this bizarre routine we'd all be nuts!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:43:26 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Beth she's starting the pump? How does she feel about that?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:43:44 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
When people say mean or wird things..rather than"reacting" to them..You can say"I am surprised that such a nice person as you would say that..I must have misunderstood...what were you thinking when you said that?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:43:56 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
A friend called the other day and asked how Lauren was and I said "She was high three times today" and my friend said, "Makes me miss the 1970's dorm life" LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:44:05 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
How do you handle when your child tries to use D to get out of something? Riley all of a sudden "need to be checked" when he is in trouble or is asked to do something he doesn't want to do?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:44:22 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
I agree Wendy. Thanks..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:44:31 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
And kids without diabetes gets rejected and treated terribly too -- I hate your yucky curly hair -- go away four eyes -- like immature adults they look for anything different to focus on - and it hurts,, and it's part of growing up.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:44:46 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Wacky humor is a good idea..hey Ellen that is your next project...getting a book of funny alternative lines for all of us to have and be able to look up..the way you might look up in a dictioinary

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:44:48 Eastern US
Heidyn (type 1 pumping saline...) from 164.106.22.70
Renee, that wouldn't work for me as thats what I am most of the time(high),it'd better be said on a low LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:45:02 Eastern US
NormaJean (Samantha, 7, dx 12/99, pumping) from 64.12.102.39
Have you thought about taking Drew up to your local fire station. They would probably love to show him around and if you asked, and provided some basic material, they would come to Drew's class and talk about D. Sam's class (K & 1st) loved it when a paramedic came to her class and talked to them about D. Sam also showed the class how she tested.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:45:14 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Moira LOL.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:45:21 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Amy Riley sounds SMART :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:45:51 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
She's really excited Laurie. Even though she takes very little insulin, she still has to get up when she doesn't want to, eat on more of a schedule, etc. She's rebelled a lot the last couple of years.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:09 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
NJ GREAT idea!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:18 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
ROFL!! Moira-I always say he is too smart for MY own good!!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:22 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
NormaJean...that is great..I will consider that..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:23 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Laurie..how do your boys do together

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:30 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Laurie, still in Maine?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:38 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Riley's sharp as a tack!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:46:57 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
I hear that loud and clear Beth. I always wonder what I did so wrong because Ryan rebels so much.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:47:25 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Beth it sounds like Sara is right on target on the rebellion? What does that do for you

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:47:36 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Laurie you are in Maine? Do you see that endo, Gary, uh, cannot remember his last name

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:47:46 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Laurie I am in Maine..Rockland from june to october

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:48:18 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
Dr Wendy - what about kids who DON'T go through any apparent rebellion? is that a cause for concern?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:48:19 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Beth I have a teen girl without D and I simply CANNOT imagine combining the challenges of D with teen years. hats off to you

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:48:31 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Dr. Wendy its like a constant battle. My levels better than yours. My meter is better than yours. And so on

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:48:32 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Awwww...thanks Betty!!!:O) We were at a vending machine and he wanted a bag of chips, I have him the dollar and he asked: "Mom how do you spell Cheetos?" he thought you had to spell the word with the letters on the keypad to get the food!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:48:33 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Has Riley every faked a low? The first time we saw Drew stagger around, begging for a 'red coke' we were convinced his blood sugar was 12! However, we were glad he was not low, but had inherited my acting skills:-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:48:54 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Ellen Ayup still in Maine

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:49:31 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Yes Rennee..I agree we have to "welcome" rebellion..reframe it to ourselves that our children aren't hiding their anger, confusion. etc. but letting us have a taste of it and asking for help

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:49:36 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Dr. Wendy - Sara acts almost schizophrenic at times but didn't used to. Can a child become manic/depressive or anything after several years of D and not taking good care of themselves?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:49:42 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
We were on a windjammer in Rockland the weekend before lauren was dx . . . the Victory Chimes

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:49:51 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
My line was always "You better hope you're low!"

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:50:02 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Amy, now that we're all done laughing at your sharp kid, I'll put in my two cents worth about your question. I think a good rule of thumb - and someone mentioned it earlier - was do what you would do if he didn't have D (unless it's a true emergency) - parent first, diabetes second.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:50:03 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
We now see Dr. Anne Bonniface. Dr. McKraken retired.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:50:04 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
YES!!!:O) He doesn't fake it, but will say: "Mom, I'm low I need........whatever it is he wants!" I don't know why he does this because we allow him to eat what he wants now that he is pumping!!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:50:42 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Renee are you thinking something is missing from your child's repertoire

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:51:20 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Thanks Betty, I guess I could check him and than he has to do what he was asked, or if I know ahead of time check him first?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:51:43 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
no - thankfully - she just never did a blatant rebellion phase but she'll be going away to college in the fall, so stay tuned!...

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:52:01 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
McCracken . . . didn't he write that book "the Sun;, the rain and the insulin"?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:52:03 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Laurie, your boys sound very normal - at least just like the boys at this house.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:52:17 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
We were out sledding earlier to-nite so no windjammer to-nite

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:53:12 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Yes thats the one. She retired last June.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:53:13 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Beth.the diabetes or not taking care of themselves doesn't "cause" illness..though admittedly moodiness does come from high blood sugars..or ups and downs...but you make a good point which is that kids can have other things besides diabetes.Are their some "inherited" ilneeses like manic depresssive or schiz in either of your families

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:53:41 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Judith you mean my boys are normal???

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:53:54 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
but she's always been this way, with or without diabetes..it's just who she is I think...and the fact that I backed off has helped us both...I've come a long way from my color-coded obsessive blood sugar records to zero records for years now

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:54:12 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Fraid so, Laurie :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:54:36 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Sounds reasonable, Amy. And as for why he's still trying to leverage the D to get favorite foods, even though the "No NO's" have now been lifted, they may still be alive and well in his mind. It may take quite some time for him to get to the point where he doesn;t worry abut the possibility of favorit foods being limited or withheld.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:54:44 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Beth..be careful not to blame either yourself or your child if you see behaviors that need addressing...and don't be afraid to get the professional assessment...frankly I can't imagine having a chronic illness without getting professional help..in the same way that you go to the dietitian..you need the mental health componetn

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:55:30 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
My husband's parents are not "sig. others" but when Riley was dx'd they said they would no longer keep them, refused to get educated and my FIL even said Riley "used to be his favorite". How do you get through to them? Or, do you just not do anything?

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:55:30 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Wendy, that expert help is often very difficult to find.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:55:42 Eastern US
Kristy (Drew 8yrs dx @3, pumping 3yrs) from 165.121.238.102
Hate to leave this beneficial chat..but need to read to the boys..We are reading a the history of railway here in the States..doesn't that sound wonderful???:-) Night all..thanks for listening!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:03 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Not that I know of. We used to think it was just all "sugars" but have found out that sometimes her moods aren't linked to sugars at all. She's on some anti-depressants now and sees both a psychologist and a counselor. I think they're finally going to run some tests.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:04 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
And you need the mental health a hell of a lot more than you need the dietitian!!! lolol (and I;m a dietitian!)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:09 Eastern US
Marcia...WA (Stephanie--17--dx'd @ 2 1/2) from 206.190.132.20
Renee-we are like clones.. Steph had color coded log books, too--- now nothing.. unless I download things right before her appt.. but now she is using several meters so that won't work.. Dinner time here so I need to go.. thanks for the chat.. makes me feel better to know I'm not alone in all this.. Thank you Dr. Wendy and Betty.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:22 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Kristy is that the book I just bought today . . . ummm, greatest something on the earth or something like that

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:36 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Nite Kristy

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:43 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Betty everyone needs you because you combine both parts..clone her I say

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:43 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Thaks so much for sharing tonight, Kristy! Night.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:56:59 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
uh-oh I'm the one buying the color coding pens you ladies have given up

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:57:17 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
I know when one of "our" Russian kids was dx'd, his father basically acted as if he'd died. Dad and grandfather had been career Navy, and that was now not possible for Jon. He "disappeared" from the family photo album. But after he came to the US, did the 800 mile bike trip, etc dad realized that he DID have a future.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:57:26 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Moira, buy them for your husband. Let him pick out his favorite colors!

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:57:51 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Thanks Marcia -- good night.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:57:51 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
I agree Laurie that your boys sound competiviely normal...and you be careful not to reinforce the "outcome" of HA1's since kids can do differently for different reasons...

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:57:53 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
LOL Ellen

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:57:55 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Ah, Wendy, you make me blush!! :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:58:13 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Betty I agree. And all parents shouls be given Valuim at the same time as all the other D scripts.

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:58:41 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
YES Laurie! One big as a baseball and we lick it as we pass by it

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:58:44 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Bye Kristy

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:58:51 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Beth you are on the right course..

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:59:14 Eastern US
maryann (mi) (Jill 16, dx'd @11, pumping) from 63.25.90.214
Hi, I wish this was the foods matter time. I want to know about mcdonalds capaccino

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:59:16 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Ouch Amy about the comment by your FIL

Tue Mar 27 2001 21:59:25 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
time to go here too..thanks Betty and SWendy - great hour as always...

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:00:08 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Sounds like an oxymoron to me McDonald's cappuccino. I say go to Starbucks.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:00:08 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Laurie, in place of Valium, I'd like to see the services given to parents with newly diagnosed kids nclude THIS!!! much more important than the majority of what is taught in diabetes education classes. Facts you can read from books -- but coping is an important skill and too much ignored in most programs.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:00:15 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
We hear some bad stories..and while we are listening we have to ifigure out how to forgive people and ourselves for responding with our human weaknesses

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:00:31 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Thanks Dr. Wendy. It's been a tough few years. I just keep on my knees most of the time.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:00:36 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Night, Renee!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:00:54 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
I always am impressed with the support you give each other..so none of you need feel alone

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:01:23 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Even if the immediate people in your lives need work in helping you..I think we can give each other great ideas..and definitely the listening

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:01:28 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Yes, these ladies are my fairygodfriends

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:01:32 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
I hear that Betty. In fact Beth is the one that lead me here many years ago. How many years ago Beth?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:01:40 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
couldn't agree more Betty...I tell parents that diabetes is only 10% mechanical (dosages, adjustments, etc and the other 90 % is social, emotional,psychological, marital, educational, familial, etc...and that's the part the doctors don't even touch upon!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:01:41 Eastern US
Heidyn (19, type 1 pumping saline..) from 164.106.22.70
Well,I'd better head on out..this probably wasn't the exact chat I needed tonight !Just remember not all of us are like that,and some are very reseponisible about D *g* Everyone have a great chat!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:01:44 Eastern US
maryann (mi) (Jill 16, dx'd @11, pumping) from 63.25.90.214
starbucks have drive thru's,? not around here

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:02:03 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Thanks Ellen, my kids used to see them almost daily before Riley was dx'd, when he was in the hospital in DKA my FIL never even came to see him and my MIL only came once in that entire week. Riley was very angry and hurt I think. When he saw his grandpa again after that, he punched him in the nose!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:02:19 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
I think the other thing that impresses me listening to you is how much growth each person can see in themselves and then turn around and give to each other in places that are more tender and raw..thatyou have already fixed up for yourself

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:02:36 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Well, Wendy and all, you have chatted up a great storm tonight. Thanks to all who contributed and hugs to all -- Next month's Feelings Matter chat will be with Dr. Barbara Anderson of Joslin, talking about parenting of school age kids with diabetes.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:02:56 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
ACtually our endo team is very into the psychological side of it. Very much so

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:02:59 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Heidyn..glad you said that..you can learn from being different

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:03:25 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Ellen I've got one pumping. If Ryan would do what he needs to do he will be pumping soon.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:03:27 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
And Heidyn..you can appreciate the problems you don't have...and that is also something you get

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:06 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Thank you Dr Wendy and Betty

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:19 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Night, Heidyn, thanks for being here.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:28 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
How does Patrick like the pumping Laurie?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:38 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Thanks Betty and Dr. Wendy

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:39 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
The chat room will stay open for another twenty minutes or so for any who want to finish up their visit! Night all -- and thanks again Wendy!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:46 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
Thanks all..and if the chat is not going your way..keep repeating the direction you need to go in...and make "us" hear you

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:04:57 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
I think this was the fastest hour EVER on the internet. Feelings Matter should always be at least 2 hours. Do we have a vote about that here?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:05:18 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Night. Sorry I was a chat hog tonight :-)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:05:27 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
This is very enjoyable and helpful, I've never been to a chat room on CWD before!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:05:28 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Ellen he loves it!! It fits in so good with him being in college.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:05:36 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Thanks Wendy and Betty.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:05:38 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
I vote for two hours as long as I promise to say less and listen more

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:05:59 Eastern US
Dr. Wendy from 64.12.103.26
take care and be well..wendy

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:06:06 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
you're lucky Moira to have a team that takes all of that into consideration...one of our "better" endos around here kept a mom & teenaged daughter waiting 2 hrs . then walked in & said "so how do you feel about having diabetes"? She glared at him, repeated his question & then said "IT SU*KS!"...he turned to the mom & asked if she was acknowledging the "anger" problem...the mom sais he was lucky SHE didn't punch him!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:06:21 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Amy you haven't been in Parent's? Sometimes I even log off! LOL

Laurie, glad to hear it. Did McCracken put many patients on the pump? Is the new endo more pump savvy?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:06:50 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Our new endo is so very pro pump.What a huge change!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:06:53 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Ellen, I think it's a great suggestion. But since all the guest hosts are doing this out of the goodness of their hearts, I haven't had the (Wendy!!) chutzpah to ask them to do two hours... I'll start shooting for an hour and a half - is that an ok compromise?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:07:07 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
GADS Renee

Laurens team MAKES us see the social worker regularly even though Lauren is just SO well adjusted. they say "Stay ahead of it!"

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:07:17 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
No, I haven't. I ususally never have time as I have 4 children (2-8 yrs) but they are all in bed now!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:07:46 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Betty, I have the chutzpah to ask :-). I so appreciate your kindness and charity in giving us your time. 1 hour is a blessing .

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:08:07 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Ellen she put very few on the pump. I was glad to see her retire but, I do miss her.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:08:07 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
We've never seen a social worker or a psych. in the almost 2 years since dx'd-it's never even been suggested.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:08:20 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
I have a friend whose daughter is a cancer survivor. She almost died at 7. Now is 14, Never saw a counselor and now she is a MESS. Eating disorder, social issues, it's terrible. I thought all along she should be seeing someone . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:09:05 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
I met Dr. Wendy when Z was first diagnosed - all I could do was sob. Lots of stages through the years....still going through stages.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:09:07 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Amy it's part of our plan -- dietician, endo, educator, social worker . . . and when she went on the pump she had to have a one hour ALONE with social worker before they'd say okay

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:09:11 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Amy - Sara was diagnosed at age 13. She's always been a quiet, shy child anyway who didn't quite fit in and this just put her in a different area altogether.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:09:14 Eastern US
BettyB (Chat Moderator) from 152.163.197.58
Thanks, Ellen, but it's a good point and I'll see if I can;t ":shoe horn" some more time out of Barbara Anderson next month! Take care -- and thanks for helping out so much as usual.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:09:24 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Dr Wendy seems like a gem

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:09:43 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Laurie, I think it's unacceptable in this day and age for a ped endo to be less than pump savvy.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:10:06 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
I've checked out the parents room a few times. There never seems to be anyone there.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:10:15 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Wow Beth, maybe I should request he/we speak to someone? Riley is also shy and quiet and I'd hate to think this could cause him problems as a teen?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:10:28 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Wendy is a gem - she also runs our pump support group.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:10:43 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Laurie, we are ALWAYS there! (it seems)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:11:04 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
I'm never there Laurie. Seldom online at all. I get on to check my mail and if I'm lucky I bump into Ellen.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:11:14 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Wow!! I don't think our endo even has any of that-they don't have a team other than a CDE and endo. When we went on the pump, the CDE trained us!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:11:25 Eastern US
Renee (melissa 18, dx'd at 9, pump 5 yrs) from 64.12.101.159
ok...now I'm REALLY leaving- LOL!! Company's just too good to leave I guess...Night all...

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:11:46 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
well the CDE trained us too, so that is most likely how it should be . . .

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:11:48 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
We were never approached in the hospital either, and I wished someone had spoke to Riley and hubby at that time.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:12:03 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
night Renee

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:12:16 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
I wish we'd gotten Sara in with someone as soon as she was diagnosed but our endo wasn't the best in the world and didn't suggest it. I think we could have avoided some problems.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:12:28 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Love ya Renee!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:12:52 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
the social worker told me she usually learns something from Lauren each time . . . but I still think it's worth it

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:13:19 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Lately I have had more on-line time. I'm on the parents e-mail list and that takes up a lot of time.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:13:39 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
That's a nice thing for the social worker to say...!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:14:09 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
It is Ellen . . . but you know Lauren . . . still I don't kid myself the teen years will be easy

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:14:16 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
I don't know how they can include diet, exercise, insulin...yada yada yada, and leave out mental health.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:14:18 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Beth is Sara now a type 1 diabetic?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:14:43 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
What is the difference b/t a social worker and a pysch as far as the counseling goes?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:14:51 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Laurie, it's really great to see you here. Have thought about you, wondered how things were going.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:15:21 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
psychiatrist can prescribe drugs. social worker cannot,

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:15:47 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
that anda bout $100,000 per year

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:16:09 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Do you get the same kind of counseling? Is one more trained than the other?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:16:28 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
ROFL Moira!!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:16:29 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Psychologist doesn't prescribe medication - just counseling. Depends on what your insurance will pay for privately or what the team offers for free.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:16:53 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Thank you Judith. I have missed the chats. We use to have such fun. Its good to see some of the old names. Its too bad that there are so many new children being dx'd.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:17:36 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Laurie, when are fiddle heads in season?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:18:39 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Soon Ellen. We still have lots of snow on the ground. We gotta wait for the snow to melt and the flood waters to go down.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:18:40 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
I think it's great Amy if you can find someone who specializes in children with chronic illnesses so they understand the 24/7 of diabetes.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:19:42 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
I'll have to ask the endo this week when Riley goes for his check-up for someone-I think dh would really benefit too!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:20:11 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Social worker may have more knowledge of community resources, etc. Their area of interest is often more than just the psychological issues.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:20:50 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Amy where do you live?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:21:15 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Laurie, I'm glad you said "old NAMES", not old faces!! LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:21:21 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Amy the whole family can benifit from counseling. I know we all could have used it.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:21:49 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Laure, what does Ryan have to do in order to be able to go on the pump?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:22:14 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Judith I almost said that! LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:22:37 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
We've spent our fair share of money on counseling. I think the siblings need it too.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:22:40 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
I live in So. Florida-a suburb of Ft. Lauderdale, we see Dr. Robyn Nemery.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:23:09 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Sorry I'm so slow in answering. Have been working on a website for the rec dept.
Sara's diagnosed a slowly developing Type 1. Is still on Glucophage as well as some insulin.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:23:29 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
BOING! re: Dr Nemery! LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:24:13 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Ellen he needs to write down what he ate and how much insulin he took for three days. Everything else is all set they are just waiting to hear from him.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:24:20 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Do you know her Judith?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:24:40 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
Amy our neighbor with a girl with D is moving there and will be seeing same endo as you -- Ellen gave her the name

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:24:41 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Only by reputation. That's Ellen's endo!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:24:50 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Amy! I'm in South Florida too and see Dr. Nemery. Dr. Wendy is in Boca Raton. Our next pump support group is April 12 and there's a kid's group from 6-7:30. Want me to email you the flyer about it? We're going to brainstorm the issues that bother kids and talk about the people and then role-play to solve problems. Which means Riley will play mom, and mom will play Riley.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:25 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Ellen's either surfing at ebay while she chats, or her computer crashed. I thought she would jump on that right away!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:25 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
back in a bit -- my butt hurts!!!! LOL

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:30 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Cool!! Yes!! My email is: small world huh?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:43 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
jbswell@bellsouth.net

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:50 Eastern US
Moira (Lauren, 9, dx 10/97, pumping) from 24.48.181.11
whaaaaa! I wanna go to that!!!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:52 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Your email is small world huh @????

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:25:54 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Sorry!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:27:01 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Now Moira!! You are going to CO. Can't have everything!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:27:05 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
I've been going to a support group in Hollywood, but it is guest speakers-we don't talk, & it's not for the kids. I'd like to have something for Riley you know?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:27:15 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Fly down Moira! Lauren will play you and you will play Lauren.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:27:25 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Beth it must be so hard on you both. Its kinda like going through uncharted waters all alone. Or are there others helping you through?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:27:39 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
ROFL!!! No, it's jbswell@bellsouth.net-for some reason it didn't show at first!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:27:45 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Generally this support group isn't for the kids per se. But April's meeting is!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:28:15 Eastern US
Beth (Sara, 18) from 206.253.63.164
Well all - I need to go out to work and start a backup. Was good seeing everyone.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:28:39 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
That will be neat, Riley will really enjoy that and I will try to get dh to go too!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:29:13 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Amy, I've added you to the list. You'll get the flyer via email.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:29:35 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Nite Beth good talking to you. My e-mail addy is still the same. lanewell@ainop.com I lost yours somewhere along the way.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:30:03 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
My email addy is CamelsRFun@aol.com

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:30:05 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Thank you Ellen, I'll be looking for it!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:31:07 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
I should get moving also. I gotta go make my bed so I won't have to sleep on the floor to-nite.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:31:16 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Oh! Any word how the thing went today in the MA Senate? Anyone heard from Cindi or Mary/MA?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:31:19 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Laurie, Beth logged off but I sent you her email addy.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:31:39 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Moira still here? She can tell you about it. She was there.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:31:45 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
I'll try to get to the parents room soon. Nite all

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:32:10 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Think this room will close soon and we'll all be bumped - Dorothy-in-Oz style - to the parent chat.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:32:32 Eastern US
Laurie (Patrick 19, dx'd 11-96, Ryan 16, dx'd 1-95) from 12.149.228.246
Thanks Ellen

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:32:48 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Bye Laurie and Beth

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:33:28 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Moira?? What happened at the Senate hearing today re: Ashley's Bill?

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:34:24 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
I better get going too, dh will probably be trying to call soon to let me know he's on his way and he won't be happy if he gets a busy signal!!:O)

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:34:55 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
If she's not still here or writing a long text...they said that they were rushed through and only a few people were able to testify. They don't know the outcome yet.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:35:16 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Bye Amy, looking forward to meeting you.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:36:31 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Thanks, Ellen. I mailed her. Night, all. I have a long drive tomorrow, so better get to bed earlier than my usual 2AM

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:36:43 Eastern US
Amy (Mom of Riley dx'd at 4) from 209.214.85.101
Me too-meeting you that is!!!:O) Thanks everyone, I learned lots!

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:37:14 Eastern US
Ellen (FL) (Zachary 13, dx'd 2/89, pump 5.5 yrs) from 205.188.200.145
Good night.

Tue Mar 27 2001 22:37:57 Eastern US
Judith (David, 15, dx'd at age 2 months; Vanya, 16, dx'd at 6) from 63.162.254.95
Uh oh! "Permanent fatal error" on my message to Moira!! I'd just mailed her a few minutes before without problem.

Chat Room Administrator Tue Mar 27 2001 23:25:00 Eastern US
This room will close in five minutes. Please move to a new room.



                 
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Last Updated: Thursday August 29, 2002 21:04:30
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