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From Cincinnati, Ohio, USA:

I have been dating a Type 1 diabetic for nearly two years now and he seems to not have his diabetes in control. He has been diagnosed for 10+ years. He is fearful of what the doctor might say so hasn't been in two years nor does he monitor his blood sugar level. He has a great exercise program and sticks to it. He has had a few seizures and numerous reactions since I have met him. I am concerned for his future and wonder if his problems are normal. I have tried to be supportive and encourage him to go to the doctor but only receive resentment and bad feelings. I don't know what to do and it is hurting our relationship. Any suggestions?


With diabetes, ignorance is not bliss. Your boyfriend is avoiding the one greatest partner he has: the doctor. I have seen this many times. People "don't want to know" so they skip physician appointments. This is complicated by the fact that some doctors only fuss when they see their patients, so the patients don't come back.

Your boyfriend's saving grace is his exercise program. That helps keep sugars in control. However, if no one is monitoring his activity in relation to his calories and blood sugar levels, well, that is risky business!

I can tell you care about this man. Don't let him "deep freeze" you out of your observations. Calmly and clearly tell him that you would like to know him for a long time: the best way to insure that is to be a partner in the truest sense. Express your concerns, learn all you can about diabetes, and urge him to return to mature self-management of his diabetes.


Original posting 10 Mar 1998
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Last Updated: Tuesday April 06, 2010 15:08:56
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